While it may seem like a state of affairs so far off on the horizon that it’s barely visible, the prospect of moving house at an advanced age is likely to affect us sooner than we may have anticipated. That’s because even if we’re barely beyond the first flush of youth, some of the people we love are probably at an altogether more senior stage. Some might euphemistically call it the “autumn of life”, while others will put it more bluntly: old. Unless we’re very unfortunate, it’s a stage we’ll reach, too, eventually. And we’re lucky to be living in a time when attitudes have become more broad-minded and thoughtful. Today, it’s not unremarkable to see men and women in their 70s and 80s living vibrant lives that include swimming, jogging and even romance. No longer does it have to mean toothlessness, knitting, TV and bed at 7pm. But however positive our attitudes to the more mature members of society might be, there’s no escaping that even the heartiest of elderly people develop certain physical frailties. It’s harder to move house when you’re 70-plus and there’s no escaping it. Hips, knees and upper-body strength all diminish, no matter the health regimen we pursue. An already-challenging endeavour becomes more so. Moving house is an undertaking with emotional, mental and physical implications. It can be done at 90 – but more forethought and more help is required. Here are our thoughts about how to make it work, whether you’re the elderly person in question or a friend/relation in a position to help them.
- Is 65 Too Old to Move?
- How Does Moving Affect the Elderly?
- Helping the Elderly Move House
- Can Age UK Help with Moving House?
- Moving for the Elderly with RMB4 Ltd
Is 65 Too Old to Move?
Absolutely not. Indeed, it’s often at around this age that moving can be a good idea. For some, it’s the ideal downsizing age, the time in life when a more manageable property becomes very appealing, whether because the departure of offspring has reduced the size of the household or because of encroaching frailty. And for others, it’s roughly the time when their grown-up children are starting to have children of their own, and moving to be nearer to family takes on a renewed importance. Even setting both those reasons aside, at 65 many people today are fortunate to still have considerable strength, energy and flexibility and the task of moving has yet to take on some of the complications it can acquire when the mover has reached their 70s and 80s. If you have to move one last time in your life, doing it while you’re still able to to take on lots of the more physically demanding aspects without needing to call on additional support is many people’s preference.
How Does Moving Affect the Elderly?
We know that moving can be arduous for anyone, but there are some implications for the elderly which are important to know about, whether you’re the elderly person in question or someone involved in helping them. There is significant American research into RSS (Relocation Stress Syndrome) and, although it can affect young, middle-aged and old alike, its implications for people whose bodies, immune systems and emotions are already affected by advanced age are possibly more severe. Someone whose cognitive abilities, for example, have begun to diminish in light of their age could be more vulnerable to RSS. And this could lead to a vicious circle because RSS can, in turn, diminish cognitive abilities. But every situation (and every individual) is different. It’s of course, entirely possible for someone to have a wholly optimistic and successful move at any age. So bear in mind the individual’s circumstances. Someone leaving a house in which they’ve lived for decades and decades – perhaps the majority of their life – could be in a more poignant and vulnerable state of mind than someone simply moving on after ten years. Among the symptoms of RSS are anxiety, depression and diminished mental functioning. Handled without the appropriate care and sensitivity, a move could seriously imperil an already-frail person, since depression and stress have been linked to shortened life expectancy.
Helping the Elderly Move House
If you’ve already taken the above into account and reflected on the ways a move can be harder for someone in his or her dotage, you’ve done a lot. It will help you to remain patient, thoughtful, sensitive and considerate as you proceed. One great thing you can give the elderly person you’re helping is time. If it’s advisable for adults to start getting themselves ready three months before a move, then take even longer. Among the tasks that may well be challenging for the person moving is the packing up. It’s great if they can get that done entirely by professionals, but since old-age moves often involve downsizing, this could well not be possible. For downsizing, we generally need to reduce the size of our belongings before the move. Going through old drawers and unearthing long-forgotten documents and photographs could be an emotional endurance test, however stoic and unsentimental we try to be. So every aspect of packing up – the inventory-taking of every item in the home, the deciding what to keep, what to put in rubbish, what to give away – should be taken at a measured pace that neither rushes the person nor needlessly slows them down.
It’s also important to remember the dignity and autonomy of the elderly person you’re helping. Even if they appear to want you to, resist the urge to make decisions on their behalf (unless, by prior agreement, you have Power of Attorney). The decision to get rid of a particular item should be solely theirs. There are so many ways you can assist them without overstepping. For example, you could make yourself as informed as possible about the space they’re moving into. That way, you can tell them if the proportions of a room will mean it’s not suitable for a particular piece of furniture.
Among the most dangerous consequences of moving for an elderly person is becoming socially isolated. While it’s unlikely you can help them acquire connections and friendships in the place they’ve yet to move to, you can certainly make it easier for them to maintain their existing ones. Help them arrange change-of-address cards, for example, and also ensure that the up-to-date details of the friends they’ll be leaving are in their address book.
Another vital thing for anyone moving, but which becomes even more critical in old age, is ensuring a seamless transition from old services to new. And top of that list of services should be GP. This can be looked into well in advance so that nothing about the person’s healthcare ends up falling between two stools in a way that could endanger their life.
Finally, helping your friend/family member manage alarming feelings makes a huge difference. Taking their temperament and tastes into account, you can arrange for/encourage them to continue doing fun and relaxing things throughout the preparation. Something as simple as breaking up the jobs with periods of revelry and amusement – concerts, restaurants, hobbies or just quiet companionships – can make everything seem do-able.
Can Age UK Help with Moving House?
Yes, not only can Age UK help, but so can other age-related charities. The extent of Age UK’s ability to help and the services it offers may depend on where you live. Find out more here. Age Co (an Age UK offshoot) have a moving checklist, as do Independent Age.
Moving for the Elderly with RMB4 Ltd
At AWT we pride ourselves on taking into account the unique circumstances of every mover, so we’re perfectly placed to move elderly clients. The surveying process we undertake with every booking gives us ample opportunity to make note of all and any requirements, including the physical limitations of the client. And we only take on courteous, bright movers, drivers and packers, so there is no risk of an already-vulnerable client being jolted needlessly by someone’s brusque, brutish or insensitive disposition. Every aspect of the AWT service – such as the care we put into looking after someone’s belongings – means we’re in a great position to help someone move in a way that allays worry and stress.
